Bangkok is no place for adderall. I first encountered this little wonder drug the same way everyone seems to, in college cramming for finals. It didn't work. This same drug was suggested to me by a doctor a couple years later when I was having fatigue issues. I was a border line narcoleptic, a condition that came partly from my own health history and partly from my paternal side of the family as exemplified by my bubbie and zadie who would come visit me in my hospital room and pass out in one of my visitor chairs within 3 minutes time, while I slept in the bed. It was a very quiet room. The gene or meme clearly didn't skip any generations as my father displays this very disorder with mast
erful precision every Saturday morning in Synagogue coming to a climactic unconsciousness during the Rabbi's sermon.
I'm not a judgemental person. I subscribe to the belief that first impressions are often wrong. Therefore I decided a second chance was in order for my old acquaintance, adderall. I had qualms about bringing the Doc's John Hancock to my local drug dispenser. While it did have some negative effects - sweating, loss of appetite, abdominal pain - it did have a few things going for it - sudden burst of energy, sudden urge to be extremely interested and meticulous in whatever the hell you happen to be doing, and a sudden relief of constipation. This latter positive externality of adderall ingestion was the reason I found myself eating one in Bangkok. I felt this was a better alternative to chugging a liter of phospho-soda, the pre-colonoscopy drug.
The Real problem with taking adderall is that after you take it you can only focus on one thing at a time as you wind up heaving all your senses into an all out overdrive in an attempt to
accomplish this one thing. If any other issues come up like a phone call, a friend comes over, you have to go to the bathroom they are either ignored or met with grumpy hostility. The problem with this medication on the streets of Bangkok is that at any given single mome
nt there are multiple occurrences that require your immediate attention and reaction; a man with two missing limbs begs for baht coins in his cup, A woman wants to give you a Thai Massage, a head full of dreadlocks smacks into your right cheek, a big backpack hits your left one, A tuk tuk (3 wheeled taxi) driver demands to take you somewhere, "Country Roads" can be heard playing in 10 different bars and is at a different note and lyric in every one, 3 cars are bearing down on you and there isn't a piece of sidewalk in sight, Pad Thai, Egg Rolls, and identical looking women selling a frog noise maker want you to have one and won't stop the noise-making until you buy one, and huts selling shitty sunglasses ha
ve surrounded you and you have flights to book, a train to catch, laundry to do, money to exchange, shitty sunglasses to buy, and no you can't drink that with ice in it it will make you sick. At this point in tim
e the senses have eclipsed their maximum; the eyeballs have made one too many journeys from left to right and have stopped themselves in the up position in protest, the ears become confused and begin whistling their own version of "Country Roads" on repeat, the taste buds are drenched in heavy wok oil which acts like a ball and chain upon the tongue, and the skin is drenched in sweat from the heat and humidity. Finally the whole body gives up and you will find it is on an overnight bus or train headed way the fuck out of Bangkok. That's where I find myself.
erful precision every Saturday morning in Synagogue coming to a climactic unconsciousness during the Rabbi's sermon.I'm not a judgemental person. I subscribe to the belief that first impressions are often wrong. Therefore I decided a second chance was in order for my old acquaintance, adderall. I had qualms about bringing the Doc's John Hancock to my local drug dispenser. While it did have some negative effects - sweating, loss of appetite, abdominal pain - it did have a few things going for it - sudden burst of energy, sudden urge to be extremely interested and meticulous in whatever the hell you happen to be doing, and a sudden relief of constipation. This latter positive externality of adderall ingestion was the reason I found myself eating one in Bangkok. I felt this was a better alternative to chugging a liter of phospho-soda, the pre-colonoscopy drug.
The Real problem with taking adderall is that after you take it you can only focus on one thing at a time as you wind up heaving all your senses into an all out overdrive in an attempt to
accomplish this one thing. If any other issues come up like a phone call, a friend comes over, you have to go to the bathroom they are either ignored or met with grumpy hostility. The problem with this medication on the streets of Bangkok is that at any given single mome
nt there are multiple occurrences that require your immediate attention and reaction; a man with two missing limbs begs for baht coins in his cup, A woman wants to give you a Thai Massage, a head full of dreadlocks smacks into your right cheek, a big backpack hits your left one, A tuk tuk (3 wheeled taxi) driver demands to take you somewhere, "Country Roads" can be heard playing in 10 different bars and is at a different note and lyric in every one, 3 cars are bearing down on you and there isn't a piece of sidewalk in sight, Pad Thai, Egg Rolls, and identical looking women selling a frog noise maker want you to have one and won't stop the noise-making until you buy one, and huts selling shitty sunglasses ha
ve surrounded you and you have flights to book, a train to catch, laundry to do, money to exchange, shitty sunglasses to buy, and no you can't drink that with ice in it it will make you sick. At this point in tim
e the senses have eclipsed their maximum; the eyeballs have made one too many journeys from left to right and have stopped themselves in the up position in protest, the ears become confused and begin whistling their own version of "Country Roads" on repeat, the taste buds are drenched in heavy wok oil which acts like a ball and chain upon the tongue, and the skin is drenched in sweat from the heat and humidity. Finally the whole body gives up and you will find it is on an overnight bus or train headed way the fuck out of Bangkok. That's where I find myself.
1 comment:
So... Adderall... Did you take it?
PS haha - I never heard Bangkok described in such perfection... :)
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